The End of Another Year

So what do I have to show at the end of this year?

Well if we backtrack to the beginning of the year and go in order. 

Manage to completely F up a relationship, graduate from high school, F up another relationship, make that two for the year so far. I see a slight pattern but that was then and this is now.

Spend a week counseling to elementary kids at a camp. See some of the most genuine smiles from kids that I was a stranger to at the beginning of the week. Definitely a good event.

Spend my final week long summer trip with my youth group and see a lot of growth and just overall love and fellowship. Another awesome event. I really learned a lot from just that one week that I think I ever had in the trips before.

Then I started college feeling alone, somewhat excited, somewhat stressed, a little out of my mind, a little depressed here and there. Still I’ve survived till now, and I’m not giving up.

I’ve changed a lot this past year, a lot of mistakes and all on my part. Emotions grabbing control and thrusting me into some pretty messed up situations. Night on a mix of a lot of caffeine and some alcohol and sometimes anger and rarely happiness, or maybe just a the outer appearance of happiness. 

I view this upcoming year to be a year of restoration within me. Not only emotionally but SPIRITUALLY, I’ve honestly been really lax on keeping my relationship with God strong and that needs to change first before anything else. I’d love to dive into new opportunities and even relationships if they come my way but we’ll see what the big man has planned.

Maybe I’ll do another post when it actually hits midnight tomorrow night, we shall see…..